Alright listen up because today is the the day all of you “ass over titties” fuckers finally see the light. An essay. Lemme set the scene. The year is 4 million BC, and our ancestors are still walking around on 4 limbs. The ass is at eye level, and that’s fantastic. This is why it became such a widely regarded sexual object. This is where your fascination with ass came from. Nothing wrong with that, right? But there’s a change- these mad lads start getting up on only two legs to walk(!). From an evolutionary standpoint this is amazing, but from a horny man’s perspective, it’s a tragedy. Suddenly, there’s nothing at eye level for him to feast his eyes upon. Yeah, this new species can more effectively travel and use his hands to carry food back to his primate crush and the rest of the group, but what’s the point when it’s harder for him to admire her voluptuous backside? This is where evolution came and saved the day once again. The chads of the primates began to pay more attention to other parts of the body- specifically the chest, since it’s much closer to eye level. Those chads started acting up over, you guessed it, the tits. Since then, nothing as evolutionarily huge as bipedalism has occurred, therefore male homo sapiens have had no issue continuing to grow their attraction towards the holy grail of hornyness, the titties. Now, there’s nothing wrong with liking ass. Its totally cool to remember our roots, where we came from, and pay respect to our ancestors who got it on and put us on this earth. However, I’ll be the first one to say, if this attraction outweighs your attraction to the likes of the milkers, the knockers, the jugs, or the twins, then that’s where you’ve got a problem. I won’t say that you’re uncivilized, uncultured, or primitive, but when your instincts go against millions of years of evolution, what else is there to call you?